Change of scenery (Greener pastures, take II)

What I wish I would have written…

My family has enjoyed our transition to our new setting and everyone has adjusted well. The kids are thriving in their new schools, and we are happy with our current situation.

Sometimes people just need a change of scenery to move past obstacles. When we left our previous life setting, our children were having some difficulties of different kinds in school. They were also having many successes. Sometimes hindsight is clouded and we dwell on the difficulties rather than the reality as a whole. I am guilty of this at times. Likewise, we may see a current situation as particularly stellar in comparison, when in reality, things are rarely that black and white. Previous frustrations, in retrospect, turn into criticism, which isn’t fair. My children have always worked with educators who cared about them, and I have been privileged to work with outstanding educators thoughout my career. Sometimes in my excitement at the growth of my children, I have assumed that when that growth was in the past difficult or challenging, that there have been specific situations that could have or should have been better. The fact is, no one can know if changes would have made things better or worse. When things improve after a big change, it has been easy to chalk things up as new is good and old was bad. I have been guilty of this from time to time. What I hope this conveys is an understanding that in our case, the catalyst for our happiness was likely simply in everyone getting the promise of a fresh start and a clean slate, which often brings out the best in anyone. Instead of framing it as greener pastures, it is far more accurate to consider it a change of scenery. Yes, our kids are doing great in our new environment, but I value the previous parts of our respective journeys just the same. Chances are, in a reverse situation, that change of scenery out of one district and into another would have created the same spark of growth. That is impossible to know, but I do regret my commentary to the contrary.

I am a passionate advocate for my children’s education. Please forgive my allowing that passion to become unnecessarily critical in hindsight.




3 thoughts on “Change of scenery (Greener pastures, take II)

  1. However, there are schools which fail children. If you were made to feel you were falling your child’s grade, at any time, that is on them. It sounds as though your family’s experience wasn’t the exception but am accepted “norm”. You should never need to apologize for advocating for your children.

  2. However, when your advocating for your children turns into denigrating professional educators who only have the best intentions for your kids as well, you maybe have a gone a step to far. Interesting how schools and teachers are to blame so nobody has to take responsibility, least of all the parents. My child is going through this same process as the author faced. They don’t like going to school, where last year they loved it. They say their teacher is too tough (which the teacher has high expectations for the kids). they don’t like doing homework because it is boring (spelling tests). So as a parent I changed some of her homework to things they enjoy. Instead of writing words down to memorize, they could write a story with the words. They can write interview questions for a person in a profession that they are interested in. The main point is that my spouse and I stepped in as parents to reignite our child’s spark and didn’t blame teachers for my child’s lack of interest. We took the responsibility ourselves and didn’t outsource the kids education.

    1. I agree. As I have written, I regret the tone and content of the previous post, and I admit it wasn’t fair. I’m glad your journey with your child has become more positive. Thanks for sharing.

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